Subject: Victor
Age: 29
Disability: too skinny
Having lived at the center of the black hole of irrelevance that is often
the gay "scene" in NYC... I can tell you first hand that the worship of
chiseled muscle bodies and faces was in full effect amongst the dimmer
set of the community (about two thirds) during the 1990's. Does the worship
of the body still rule, and the acceptance of the true self still drool,
in the gay scene in New York? Well... it's gotten a lot more complex, or
maybe I'm just getting old. Nevertheless much like hippies and punks ...that
particular bloby subculture still exists, despite the rest of the gay world
having moved on.
So it was with great pleasure that I first looked at Victor's online gay
personal ad on BigMuscle.com. It was sent to me by a friend who is often
sending me "interesting" gay ads filled with "freaks." I saw Victor's unusually
skinny frame, I smiled and chuckled. I passed it on to someone else.
But, something kept making me want to revisit Victor's ad again and again.
Something about the look on his face, and the fact that he was so slim,
and
I mean really, really slim,compared to the thousands of other ads
of muscle-y and want-to-be-muscle-y guys on the sites. And the fact that
he didn't care... seemed to single-handedly hammer the last nail in the
coffin of some dumb, tired tradition... what exactly I don't know... but
whatever it's effect was, it was positive. I kept looking back again and
again... I don't know why exactly I found it so inspirational. I soon discovered
that Victor had other ads on other sites. You can look at them
here
and here.
I think it was his seeming confidence and lack of any pretense. Victor
states in his ad; "People Think I Look Ugly But I Don't Care What They
Think Or Say About Me I Think I'M An AlRight Kind Of Person. Thank You
For Stoping Bye." He even shows off parts of his body (biceps)
in close-up and shows himself working out on his home gym. Is Victor
a "freak?" No. Victor is a genius. Suddenly all the other ads on BigMuscle
looked like they weren't even there.
You know that often misunderstood old saying "You can wear anything and
as long as you wear it with confidence you'll look like a million bucks?"
Well here it is in all it's simple and unconquerable glory.
Victor has taken the one thing that most people wouldn't DARE show on sites
like BigMuscle.com and just does.
So for all you gay guys who think you're too skinny or too fat or too ugly
or too short or too bald... and think others treat you poorly because of
this and say things like "...oh I don't go into gyms because the guys
there have too much attitude and are rude to people like me..." or
even worse; "I think it's unfortunate that the gay community places
so much emphasis on appearance" (like I just did above) ...well a big
whopping BULLSHIT has been called on you (and me?) and your popped-balloon
LIE. Read it and weep: Victor is now KING of the mountain and you guys
are sitting on the sidelines (still).
Am I reading too much into this? Probably... but that's just because Victor
is my new hero. So with Victor being my #1 new HERO OF ALL TIME. I decided
I need to know MORE! MORE!!! I contacted him for an inside scoop. It took
a little persistence... but I eventually got a hold of him and found him
to be friendly, open and... as I expected... lacking in any sort of pretense
or defeatist attitude whatsoever:
Me: Were you always
this slim? Even as a child?
Victor: Yes Why?
Me: Well, I mean,
is your skinniness natural, were you born that way? Or was there a certain
medical condition that made you so slim? Are others in your family that
slim?
Victor: I Had
Some Wieght On Me When I Was A Baby When I Got Older I Loss It All.
Me: Do you feel a
bond with other skinny people?
Victor: Yes &
No, I Stick To My Self.
Me: Do you consider
yourself confident?
Victor: Yes I
Do.
Me: Do you consider
yourself an exhibitionist?
Victor: Yes I
Do.
Me: Even though you
have an extremely slim body, why did you place yourself on a web site with
a bunch of muscle guys?
Victor: Because
I Wont To Get Bigger Muscle.
Me: Do you think
your particular body type within the gay community, garners you special
attention?
Victor: No Because
People Think I Look Ugly To Thim.
Me: Do you ever go
into public gyms?
Victor: No I
Have My Own Gyms.
Me: Why do you smile
so big? You seem really content. Do you consider yourself happy?
Victor: Yes And
No.
Me: What does the
phrase "If you've got it, flaunt it!" mean to you?
Victor: I Don't
Know. *
*the
perfect answer!